Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
Randomize