so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
he was CRYING into my vagina
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
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