I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
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