Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
So here I am, sexting at work.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize
