I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
