what if I'm pregnant?
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am