Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
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