You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
Just woke up, shitty hungover, and realized that every article of clothing I slept in was backwards, bra included. Fuck you, gin. Fuck you.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
Randomize
