I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
Randomize
