You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
19 People Who Had An Inappropriate Celebrity Encounter
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
21 Awkward Ways People Found Out Their Partner Was Into Outrageous Sex Acts
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH