If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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