I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
Randomize
