so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Randomize
