I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
You have to summon your inner elephant
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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