How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
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