Need sex. Gaining weight.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
Randomize
