I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Randomize
