Getting a high five from your dog when you're stoned is one the greatest rewards of being a pet owner.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
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