How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
Randomize
