I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
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