found the other keg... it's in the tree
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
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