look no pants
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
