Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
My vagina is officially offended.
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