his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Randomize