I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
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