Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
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