I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
and the officer said have you been drinking
and i said NOO SIR.
and he said, I am a woman.
Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
you inspire me to be a worse person
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
Randomize
