i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
Randomize
