An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
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Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
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You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
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