I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
