I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
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If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
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You were face down in the punch bowl, humming the theme to jaws
That explains the stains on my shirt
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
Randomize