Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
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