i love accidental penises.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
Randomize
