conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My vagina is officially offended.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
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