Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
I love how my cats smell like pot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
Dude, I totally just made my launch phrase on my new phone "Wingardium Leviosa" so that when people try it and it doesn't work I can say, "It's leveeOHsa, not leveeoh-SA."
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
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