I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
Randomize
