I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
Cracked my iPhone screen. Real bad. Girl from last night isn't ugly yet. Stop me if you still think she belongs under a bridge. You have 12 seconds.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
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