Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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