If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
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