yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
I said "one day" and that day is not today
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
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