i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
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