I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
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