This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
A woman with Alzheimer's pointed at me and said, "Don't forget to wear socks, because you're a lady!" I think it's legit advice.
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Randomize