Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
420 ftw
she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
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