Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
3pm strippers are depressing
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
so much tequila, so little girl.
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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