new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
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