So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
Randomize