I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
