"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
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