I have surprise drugs for everyone
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
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